Suffering From Cheerfulness

I would like to draw the readers attention to an absolutely brilliant book we have on the catalogue- Suffering from Cheerfulness The Best Bits from The Wipers Times.

It is full of interesting and funny stories from the paper that soldiers made and circulated between themselves on the front during the war. Including this wonderful poem.

VIRTUE

 

Now you subs of tender years

For your morals, it appears,

(You must admit they're open much to question)

There is shortly going to be

A morality O.C.,

Who will see that vice does not spoil

your digestion.

 

His H.Q. is going to be

Close by Leicester Square, and he

Will parade his Batt. for duty everynight,

In his ranks we'll shortly see

P'raps a Bishop or M.P.,

Who will see that virtue's path you tread

aright.

 

If on leave and pleasure bent

At Victoria, a gent

Will grab you as you're dodging off alone,

Will escort you to H.Q.,

When you'll quickly find that you

Are provided with an aged chaperone,

Your amusement will depend

On how much she'll let you spend,

And you'll dine at Lyons or an A.B.C.,

Should you dare to want a drink,

With a look she'll make you think

What an awful well of sin a sub can be.

 

You may smoke one cigarette,

Ere retiring you will get

All your orders for the morrow's pleasure

feast,

Hand your cash in charge, and then

Off to bed as clock strikes ten,

Feeling that in former days you were a

beast.

 

You will come to learn and love

Programmes as described above

For you must admit that you were most

immoral.

 

You will find when leave's expired

That your fancies will have tired

For the glass that sparkles, and for lips of

coral.